There are some things in this world that happen that just seem illogical, impossible, mythological, or just plain nut job.
I'd throw being possessed by the devil in that category, despite my strong belief in the Bible. Some of those stories just seem slightly over imaginative to my naturally cynical mind.
I mean, How many people have you met that were possessed by the devil?
And don't say, "Your Mom".
Or Your own mother...
Serious here. Really? The Devil.
I can make some crazy sound affects--I'm quite talented actually, but I can't fake the devil's noises.
I had no clue what that sounded like...
Until...
My last year of college.
Man, You learn so much at college.
Yes, One of five catholics on campus; I know about garlic and vampires, and holy water can melt anything evil and pop the suckers into thin air.
Who am I kidding?!
I was horror struck and yet amused when I walked into my 8man suite to hear from 6 girls barricading the bathroom door, "Don't go in there, funny noises are coming out of there."
"Hmm, that's not uncommon", I say.
"No, Lindsey is talking in strange voices on the toilet; it's not her at all.", Sally says.
Are you telling me what I think you're telling me?
"Wait, what? I want to hear; that is so cool. Let me get my cross and some holy water.", I say.
I proceeded to extend my ear through the bathroom wall, but the praying warrior freaks (aka: SEU RAs) came to the rescue.
Sometimes, I wish I could sound like a babbling baboon when I pray too. They spoke intimidatingly fast and furious; loud and ferocious--they scared us all into our bedrooms.
Couldn't stop the roommate and I for very long!
We took up the Cross! Literally.
And we went around praying in every room (made an X on the bathroom door). I pretended I had holy water and robotically sprinkled it on all the beds. Don't want a devil in our beds...
The whole time, I couldn't stop thinking...
Why, How tragic! The devil possessing you while sitting on a toilet!
Opportune time, I guess.
Some might think it was a bad case of diarrhea or Salmonella.
In this case, I had my doubts about her sanity in the first place.
But when I heard her--I knew it was the Devil.
No Denying it.
She was Possessed.
And did I mention?
On the Toilet?
I don't know what happened to the Devil; I didn't see it go into a horde of swine, but it was gone in a few hours.
I fell asleep to the incessant praying RAs.
The possessed girl went home forever. And we got a new suitemate.
No more Toilet Ghosts of "Christ"mas Past.
Beware, the Devil is out there. Next time you're on a toilet; I'd say a prayer...
I'd throw being possessed by the devil in that category, despite my strong belief in the Bible. Some of those stories just seem slightly over imaginative to my naturally cynical mind.
I mean, How many people have you met that were possessed by the devil?
And don't say, "Your Mom".
Or Your own mother...
Serious here. Really? The Devil.
I can make some crazy sound affects--I'm quite talented actually, but I can't fake the devil's noises.
I had no clue what that sounded like...
Until...
My last year of college.
Man, You learn so much at college.
Yes, One of five catholics on campus; I know about garlic and vampires, and holy water can melt anything evil and pop the suckers into thin air.
Who am I kidding?!
I was horror struck and yet amused when I walked into my 8man suite to hear from 6 girls barricading the bathroom door, "Don't go in there, funny noises are coming out of there."
"Hmm, that's not uncommon", I say.
"No, Lindsey is talking in strange voices on the toilet; it's not her at all.", Sally says.
Are you telling me what I think you're telling me?
"Wait, what? I want to hear; that is so cool. Let me get my cross and some holy water.", I say.
I proceeded to extend my ear through the bathroom wall, but the praying warrior freaks (aka: SEU RAs) came to the rescue.
Sometimes, I wish I could sound like a babbling baboon when I pray too. They spoke intimidatingly fast and furious; loud and ferocious--they scared us all into our bedrooms.
Couldn't stop the roommate and I for very long!
We took up the Cross! Literally.
And we went around praying in every room (made an X on the bathroom door). I pretended I had holy water and robotically sprinkled it on all the beds. Don't want a devil in our beds...
The whole time, I couldn't stop thinking...
Why, How tragic! The devil possessing you while sitting on a toilet!
Opportune time, I guess.
Some might think it was a bad case of diarrhea or Salmonella.
In this case, I had my doubts about her sanity in the first place.
But when I heard her--I knew it was the Devil.
No Denying it.
She was Possessed.
And did I mention?
On the Toilet?
I don't know what happened to the Devil; I didn't see it go into a horde of swine, but it was gone in a few hours.
I fell asleep to the incessant praying RAs.
The possessed girl went home forever. And we got a new suitemate.
No more Toilet Ghosts of "Christ"mas Past.
Beware, the Devil is out there. Next time you're on a toilet; I'd say a prayer...
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